Nice Boy That Man You Brought Home Last Night

Jeff Poem

Nice Boy That Man You Brought Home Last Night

Jeff Poem
Jeff Poem
Stiletto cuts Stiletto cut Stilletto cut girl

cut girl cunt stilletto cut girl cut cunt

stilletto cut stilletto cut slit girl

fuck slit fuck cut
 Vex Dhole 78

n.b. Jeff had this down as a sort-of shouty song with each word more or less coming out as long punctuated staccato of either 1, 2 or 3 word clumps along with a jarring guitar.  I can’t remember the punctuation and it’s not included here, but the punctuation was important and added to the shock value and was not where you might think.   We experimented a few times but as far as I know there are no recordings.  I think we tried it live but I had misgivings anyway in the environment in which we existed. 

Crawling Chaos Magnum Innoninandum Cassette Cover
Crawling Chaos Magnum Innoninandum Cassette Cover

He has the date as 78 but it was more like 76 I think when we were ~19/20.  He said it to  me it in his mam’s living room during the time we were into Ege Bamyasi etc and wrote “The Prick”, “Merry Xmas Prince Charles” and stuff like that as well as being part of what was Magnum Innoninandum . (SP)

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First Gig

First Gig at Bridge Hotel Newcastle

As mentioned here, the first gig was at the Bridge Hotel next to the Norman Keep after which Newcastle is named – it was called Monkchester prior to this because of all the monks and monasteries.

In a burst of stupid creativity we decided to create a magazine, with no real idea what to do afterwards.  We filled it with all sorts of stuff, one of which was a scurrilous depiction of our first gig by Thatcher, the devilish UK prime minister at that time.  This is the transcript….

Forward by Magret Thatche (sic)

I first met the members 
of the Crawling Chaos early 
in 1979, where they were 
playing the Bridge Hotel 
Newcastle, Impressed!  
- I can tell you 
that taught me a thing or two.
  the guitarist had two 
trails of snot bouncing like 
yo-yos off the ground
  the singer had a Viking 
Helmet with two visibly 
used Dr White's 
hung like 
spaniels lugs 
from where 
the horns
 should have been

And I'd like to 
say frankly 
that Bowie character 
gets on my tits


This is a scan from Jeff.  He described what happened with the “magazine” later, here.

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The Crawling Chaos Magazine


Crawling Chaos Magazine

This comes from an email from Jeff in which he’d scanned some old bits and reminisced about our joint frames of mind back in 1983-5….

Tue 08/04/2008 22:29

Hi Rees,
I’ve had a scurry about and found a few more tangible bits of history – the majority (the stuff with the scribbled text and lyrics) are the remnants of a Crawling Chaos A4 fanzine that we colour-photocopied and sent out as a freebie to certain selected correspondents, here presented in the order of discovery. There are also a few posters, reviews and a newspaper article. Also included is a promo photo of Thee Earnest Kakas at the height of their powers. The line up from L to R is: Holly, Vex Drongo, Gordon Douglas Smith and Yeti (my name may have changed but not the hat obviously) This was another of many parallel projects running alongside CC, this one was more focused on surreal comedy than our “normal” output. I’ve included a picture of Bebside Hall as it was about 4 years ago. I don’t think I’ve got anything else – I’ll look though.
Looking at the fanzine again after scanning, I can now see that Holly’s “Holiday” series of cartoons was intended to end with Backworth and the “Explanation” of the Contents page should be at the front. If there ever was a cover it’s not there now. I like the style though and I think the document gives an accurate reflection of our frames of mind at the time, which judging by the lyrics included must have been after the release of C and before the recording of Waqqaz.
Well I think that’s enough for now.

Cheerio, Jeff

I’ve finally got round to uploading this stuff (sp)

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All Screwed Up Inside

All Screwed Up Inside

I Aint got no ulcers

cos I don’t worry none

‘cept one or two

but they’re up my bum



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