The Crawling Chaos Magazine

Mushrooms

Crawling Chaos Magazine

This comes from an email from Jeff in which he’d scanned some old bits and reminisced about our joint frames of mind back in 1983-5….

Tue 08/04/2008 22:29

Hi Rees,
I’ve had a scurry about and found a few more tangible bits of history – the majority (the stuff with the scribbled text and lyrics) are the remnants of a Crawling Chaos A4 fanzine that we colour-photocopied and sent out as a freebie to certain selected correspondents, here presented in the order of discovery. There are also a few posters, reviews and a newspaper article. Also included is a promo photo of Thee Earnest Kakas at the height of their powers. The line up from L to R is: Holly, Vex Drongo, Gordon Douglas Smith and Yeti (my name may have changed but not the hat obviously) This was another of many parallel projects running alongside CC, this one was more focused on surreal comedy than our “normal” output. I’ve included a picture of Bebside Hall as it was about 4 years ago. I don’t think I’ve got anything else – I’ll look though.
(….)
Looking at the fanzine again after scanning, I can now see that Holly’s “Holiday” series of cartoons was intended to end with Backworth and the “Explanation” of the Contents page should be at the front. If there ever was a cover it’s not there now. I like the style though and I think the document gives an accurate reflection of our frames of mind at the time, which judging by the lyrics included must have been after the release of C and before the recording of Waqqaz.
Well I think that’s enough for now.

Cheerio, Jeff

I’ve finally got round to uploading this stuff (sp)

All You People Get Off My Back

All You People Get Off My Back

      

Gob On The Tyne has a a book out soon-ish (tekkin’ its time, innit?) about punk doings round Newcastle.  This track is to be included on a CD accompanying the book.

Yack Yack Yack that's all I hear exuding from your gob, Why don't you just run away and go surfing down a bog?
Yack Yack Yack that’s all I hear exuding from your gob, Why don’t you just run away and go surfing down a bog?

It’s previously un-released on the major output and comes under the Outakes-etc category…  It’s based on an old Jeff riff from the early days.   No further explanation is needed as it’s self-explanatory what it’s about.  (SP)

Punk Band Rap Free Concert Snub – a transcript

   Martin Blank from Gob on the Tyne has prompted me to transcribe an old cutting from Jeff about an earlier exploit of the band….  This is it!

Punk Band Rap Free Concert Snub

Punk rock band crawling chaos hit a wrong note when they made overtures to a Christian group.

For when the Tyneside-based musicians offered to play free in a church coffee bar they were turned down flat.

“We were amazed and shocked at being turned down” said band member Eddie Fenn last night.

“We thought we were doing them a good turn. We were surprised when they turned us down”.

“It is supposed to be a Christian organisation and they wouldn’t even let us play” said the 23 year old youth and community worker of Front Street, Tynemouth.

They were due to appear tonight at the Tynemouth Crossroads coffee bar in the centre of the town.

“They cancelled the show with no explanation other than ‘The coffee bar is run by a group of Christians to help young people in Tynemouth, and seeking to follow Christ’, and ‘only two people on the committee knew about it, and the rest of the committee are not happy’”, said Eddie.

Awaiting.

“One wonders at the reasoning behind such a bland statement when you consider the appalling lack of recreational facilities for teenagers, the fact the group were willing to play free of charge and that many youngsters were eagerly awaiting the performance. We have a medium sized following around here.”

The four man band, which has been formed for 11 months, is due to release a single next month called “Sex Machine”.

The line-up is Eddie on drums, taxi driver Martin Rees aged 24 of Front Street, Tynemouth on vocals and electric organ; guitarist Jeff Crowe, a 23 year old cataloguer of Tynemouth Road, Howden; and civil servant David Holland, aged 21 from Seaton Delaval, on bass.

One of the organisers of the coffee club said that they had apologised to the group for the mix-up.

David Armstrong, 32 year old painter and decorator from Tynemouth said; “More than a month ago the band came to me and asked if they could play at the Friday night coffee bar.

I told them I would ask the other members of the bar, but I forgot and when the group came back I said it would be alright.

When the other organisers found out they weren’t too happy. They said it hadn’t been discussed properly.

It was really an internal disagreement. I feel sorry for the group and I have apologised but I don’t want anyone blamed for it.!

Postscript

The band did eventually play the gig.  All went well and no-one was offended.  Pip pip!

 

DMCA Infringement by Black Box Access

Black Box Access Scam

BlackBoxAccess File Example
BlackBoxAccess File Example

I recently became aware that Crawling Chaos’s material was available in search results again.

Naturally, I decided to have a look!

Many of the links (some even said ‘verified’!) pointed to Black Box Access who, for a “introductory membership fee” of $4.95 claimed to have a host of links to our stuff.

Big Fat Con

BlackBoxAccess Shit Example
BlackBoxAccess Shit Example

However, I noticed that search results returned exactly what I typed…. which is odd.  Very odd indeedy!

The crunch moment came first when I typed our newest remixes, which are tagged with 2011, which also returned results.

I then typed the killer entry to our latest (so far totally fictional release) Shit on Your Tits.  This I just made up on the spur of the moment.

Bingo!

They claimed to have a rar file for it, uploaded in the last week and downloaded in excess of 19000 times since!

Also, in a final clue, I accidently clicked on an advert to a webpage that would not go away, producing popup after popup after popup –  a clear sign of scamminess.

Big Fucking Cunt Criminal Bastards

BlackBoxAccess DMCA
BlackBoxAccess DMCA

I decided to contact this wonderful exercise in criminality by filling in their DMCA claim form!  Here’s what I wrote.  Needless to say, I don’t expect a reply.

I am the representative for the band Crawling Chaos and request immediate removal of the following links which I believe to contain our copyright works for which we’ve neither received a request nor given permission for your usage on your website.
Downloading of our material on websites such as yours does not constitute “fair usage” under our terms nor that of common or set law.  This is because it’s neither there for fair comment or research, plus, you charge for it which means royalties are owed.
I’ve found:
Homunculus Equinox
The Gas Chair
Gas Chair Clown
C
The Big C
Sex Machine

on your site.
All our discography can be found here:

Discography


The copyright statement is also to be found on that website.

Also, since you claim on the logon screen to have downloaded the above files in excess of 19000 times and that the initial signup fee is $4.95, this comes to a total of approximately $100,000.  This money is now due to the surviving members of Crawling Chaos and the heirs of the deceased members.  Please contact me at the contact email address to discuss how this will be paid to us.

Conclusion – What Does it All Mean?

  • What a bunch of fucking cunts. It’s all fiction.  Everything.
  • Do you really think that I’m expecting a reply?
  • What they’re getting is your financial and email details.
  • You’ve been warned!

Ask yourself;

“Do I want to give my details to this bunch of crooks?”

Our Label, Our music, Our Shop

Foetus Products
Foetus Products

You can of course get our stuff from our wonderful custom shopping experience at Foetus Products.  It’s the now-recommended route for all Crawling Chaos aficionados and resellers.

The finale, Spookhouse, will be out early next year.